Lustige Englische Sprüche - Funny Sayings

Don't eat yellow snow!

Even on the highest throne you sit on your own butt.
Michel de Montaigne (1533-1592)

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

Everyone has photographic memory, some just don't have the film.

Everyone is entitled to his own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Will Rogers (1879-1935)

I'm so clever, that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I'm saying.
Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

I plan on living forever. So far, so good.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

I Love you, you Love me, we can make a family!

In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.

Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay and you never get anything back.
Al Bundy

It is a good thing that we do not get as much government as we pay for.
Will Rogers (1879-1935)

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Love is a name, sex is a game, forget the name and play the game.

On his dunghill is the rooster king.
Publilius Syrus (lebte v.Chr.)

Roses are red, violetts are blue, god made me beautiful, but what happend to you?

Seafood diet - Every time I see food, I eat it.

The chicken came first - God would look silly sitting on an egg.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

The last car is always a station wagon!

The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless.
Nicholas Chamfort (1741-1794)

We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.
Will Rogers (1879-1935)

When somebody tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football.

The lesson is: Never try!
Homer Simpson